O, The Oprah Magazine

La Crème d'Amour™ in Oprah's Magazine "O"

By Amy Finnerty

Today is the first day of the rest of your sex life. And the Berman sisters-Jennifer, a physician, and Laura, a sex therapist- want to help you make it everything it could be.

Thanks to a little blue anti-impotency pill called Viagra, and to Bob Dole, erectile dysfunction has attained an odd kind of status. Like depression, the inability to perform or enjoy sex is now a relatively shame free-medical problem that can often be cured and, what's more, talked about. At least for men. Women's complaints are still regularly dismissed as emotional pathology or the inevitable limitations of the female sexual response. But the fact is more than 40 percent of women suffer from some sort of sexual dysfunction, according to the Journal of the American Medical Association, and fortunately for them, and for anyone who simply wants to enhance her sexuality, two smart sisters are riding in on white horses to give women equal access to joy. Jennifer Berman, MD, one of only a handful of women urologists in the country, and her sister, Laura Berman, PhD, a sex therapist, run the Female Sexual Medicine Center at UCLA. Their book, For Women Only: A Revolutionary Guide to Overcoming Sexual Dysfunction and Reclaiming Your Sex Life (Henry Holt), ushers in a new age of sexual enlightenment. Using psychological education, sophisticated new diagnostic methods, and a few old-fashioned sex toys, the Bermans are stripping tired mythology from the female orgasm. They have a lot of satisfied patients. Recently I called the Berman sisters in California and we talked.

O MAGAZINE:
What are the biggest myths about women's sexual satisfaction?

JENNIFER BERMAN:
That sex is supposed to lead to intense, earth-shattering, monumental orgasms every time. That's not a realistic expectation. You need to make the most of the good times and not fret or stress over the times when it might not be good-unless the bad times are outnumbering the good.

LAURA BERMAN:
Two other myths people subscribe to are that you have to be with a partner to be sexually satisfied and that you have to have intercourse to be sexually satisfied. Sexual intimacy does not always have to end in intercourse. There are other ways to become aroused and have orgasms, including self-stimulation, oral sex and massage.

O:
If a woman complains that her partner can't satisfy her, is it her responsibility to teach him?

LB:
Yes, to a certain extent. This is actually a big crusade of mine. Men learn about sexuality, female sexuality, in a couple of ways. They may get some basics of anatomy and physiology as part of their elementary and high school education. They may hear about it from their friends- who are all misinformed anyway- or they may watch the average porn movie, which is really geared toward a man's response, not a woman's. So you can have a man who has been with 200 women and still has no idea....

O:Are there creams or oils available that can heighten pleasure?

LB:
There are several products already on the market to enhance pleasure in women and many remedies being developed for female sexual-dysfunction complaints. They include medically based drugs and herbal products that increase arousal and lubrication as well as libido: sensation- enhancing creams like Viacrème....

<< Back to Resources

Edited and Brought to you by: